Finding love online St. Michael’s alumni named Vermont Couple of the Year
By Emily Rose Staff Writer
Photo by Ali Destrempe On Jan. 3, Chad and Amy Ahern found out they were named eHarmony's Vermont Couple of the Year.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, people search the Internet for flowers and gifts to give to a significant other. Some have used cyberspace to find love.
Chad Ahern, assistant director of the St. Michael’s Fund, and his wife, Amy (Chmielewski) Ahern, were recently named eHarmony’s Vermont Couple of the Year. Both are St. Michael’s alumni. Chad graduated in 1999 and Amy in 2002.
Chad pursued other dating services and Amy briefly considered doing the same, but both said they found eHarmony more suitable for their needs. Chad liked eHarmony’s philosophy of matching people on values, compatibility and emotional capacity for each other, he said.
“I wanted a relationship that was quality,” Amy said. “I wanted somebody that knew what they wanted.”
According to eHarmony official Joe Zink, the company matches couples on a patented scientific algorithm using 29 dimensions of compatibility. eHarmony researched 5,000 successful married couples and determined which dimensions predicted good relationships. Researchers isolated the traits of the couples that seemed to be the happiest, he said.
“We’re focused on long-term relationship satisfaction,” Zink said.
After Chad registered, he read a book that eHarmony founder Neil Clark Warren wrote. Chad was more confident after reading the book, he said.
eHarmony did the work for him, Chad said. He didn’t have to search the site for profiles.
“It’s like being introduced to a room of people that you already have something in common with,” Chad said.
eHarmony members must commit to four steps before meeting in person, Chad said. The fourth step, open communication, involves an internal e-mail system, he said. To stay anonymous, eHarmony does not provide personal information yet, Chad said.
“I definitely like the steps,” Amy said. “It was very safe.”
To begin the communication process, members pay a $50 fee, Amy said. When Chad showed an interest in talking with her, she told her mother, who paid the fee.
“On our wedding day I gave her the $50 back,” Amy said. “I guess it’s worth it.”
Chad and Amy were married by the Rev. Ray Doherty of St. Michael’s, on July 28, 2007. Doherty also married Amy’s parents in 1974.
“In his sermon he said, ‘What goes around, comes around,’” Amy said. “It was kind of the model for his homily.”
Doherty has known Amy since her childhood and met Chad while he was a student at St. Michael’s. They asked him to officiate their wedding because he married Amy’s parents, he said. Both weddings took place at the Chapel of St. Michael the Archangel, Doherty said.
“I feel privileged,” Doherty said. “It’s always a pleasure to prepare them and officiate the wedding of those I’ve known as students. There’s a certain amount of gratification.”
Doherty said the couple is very devoted to the church and he sees them regularly.
Amy and Chad e-mailed the story of their eHarmony relationship without knowing it was a competition, Amy said. They wrote their story to show gratitude. In December, they received a call from eHarmony notifying them that they were one of the top three couples in Vermont, she said. On Jan. 3 they found out they were the Vermont Couple of the Year.
“It’s quite an honor,” Amy said. “I’m proud of both of us for going to eHarmony and I’m grateful that there’s a service out there that can bring two people together.”
The contest is based on the story of the contestants, Zink said. Thousands of couples entered eHarmony success stories. eHarmony workers were assigned to read entries from each state. A committee met and read the top entries for each state, and then it voted for a winner, he said.
Chad said they wrote a short story of 300 words. After logging onto the Web site, they discovered eHarmony wanted members to use 1,500 words to describe their relationship, he said.
“One of the reasons we stuck out was because ours was extremely short and it was concise and it had all the components,” Chad said.
As a state winner, Chad and Amy will receive a plaque from eHarmony acknowledging them as the Vermont Couple of the Year. The national winner, to be announced Feb. 14, will receive a trip to Orlando, he said.
This is the second annual eHarmony state competition, the first taking place in 2002, Zink said. Naming a couple for each state has been in effect for only the last two years, he said.
“It’s a great way to acknowledge all of these wonderful stories that we get all year long,” Zink said.
Amy’s favorite story to tell happened before she and Chad knew each other. She was living in Boston and attended an alumni event that Chad was staffing as part of his job. He was taking names of the attendees and she remembered his face, she said.
“We started talking on eHarmony,” she said. “He told me what he did and I said to my mom, ‘I swear I’ve seen this guy.’ Sure enough, he showed me the photo and it was the same guy.”
Chad said there were plenty of opportunities for the two of them to meet, but they didn’t.
“You cross people at some points in your life and you’re just not ready to meet them yet,” Chad said.
“Sometimes those paths come back around and it’s at those points that you need to take advantage of them, and eHarmony said you two really need to meet now.”
