Posted: 03/07/07

Stomping out bullies
One parent's quest for anti-bully laws

Ali Destrempe | contributing writer
adestrempe@smcvt.edu

John Halligan, (left) lost his son Ryan (right) when he commited suicide after being bullied online. (Photo courtesy of http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/)

On May 18, 2004, gov. Jim Douglas passed a law that outlined guidelines schools should follow to prevent bullying. Unfortunately, the law came too late for parents Kelly and John Halligan, whose son Ryan ended his life after being "cyberbullied" online by his peers.

“Losing a child is a parent’s biggest nightmare,” John Halligan says, “but suicide brings a lot more baggage with it.”

Bullying has taken a new online form, known as cyberbullying, which occurs through e-mails and instant messages. Halligan says he wants legislation against cyberbullying.

More than conflict resolution

The bullying started when Ashley, a peer of Ryan's sent Instant Messages to Ryan describing how she liked him, but it when Ryan approached her she ridiculed him, saying that she didn’t actually like him at all, Halligan says.

“She set him up,” he says. “She had no intentions.”

The bullying didn’t just come from a girl online, but also a boy in Ryan’s grade, Halligan says. Halligan had a lot of anger initially when he found out after his son’s death, that a classmate had spread rumors that Ryan was gay, he says.

Although Ryan never confided in his father about the rumors about him being gay he did mention kids were giving him a hard time, Halligan says.

After Ryan’s death, Halligan went to Albert D. Lawton Middle School to question the administration about bullying. Halligan wanted to inform the school that bullying was taking place that they had no idea about, he says.

“If my son was bullied and I came in, what would you do?” he questioned the administration. Halligan says the school responded, stating they had peer mediation groups and a concept called “conflict resolution.”

“Losing a child is a parent’s biggest nightmare,” John Halligan says, “but suicide brings a lot more baggage with it.” (Photo courtesy of http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/)

Halligan then took action, because he believed the school's bullying policy was insufficient, he says. He thought confronting a bully with his target for remarks is like “re-victimizing the victim,” he says.

Halligan then went to the State Representative of Essex Junction, Peter Hunt for help. where he said “schools are not being held responsible for these issues." The main purpose of the bill is to make society become aware of bullying issues, and that no child should ever self inflict pain on themselves or feel so threatened by any other child, Halligan says.

They started the process of a bill in January 2004. By May 18, 2004, the anti-bullying bill was passed as a law for the state of Vermont. The Halligan family was present during the signing, he says.

Moving On

Halligan now travels to several high school and middle schools around the country sharing his son’s story.

“I’ve been to over 80 schools in Vermont,” he says.

Recently, Halligan visited Lakeview Middle School in Kansas, City, Mo. Principal Jim Dunn says his visit “was not a dog and pony show assembly." Dunn says he became aware of Halligan through his involvement with i-SAFE, an Internet education Web site.

Jeff Godlis, media department organizer for i-SAFE wrote in an e-mail that i-SAFE is an “Internet industry that makes young people and their parents aware of the risks of the internet.”

Lakeview Middle School is one of many schools who learn anti-bullying approaches and systems through i-SAFE, Godlis wrote.

“We believe in education and empowerment. The lessons aren’t just memorizing concepts and terms in the classroom,” Godlis wrote, “They are interactive lessons designed to help students think. They are empowered to change their potentially risky behaviors.”

Halligan recently spoke at Lakeview Middle School. The assembly was scheduled for 90 minutes, though Dunn says teachers were originally nervous about the lengthy assembly given the attention span of most students. Students were very engaged, Dunn says.

“You could hear a pin drop in the place,” he says."

Staff members and students later approached Dunn saying the assembly was the most powerful and amazing assembly they have seen in all their years of teaching, he says.

"The kids gave Halligan a standing ovation, and some even wrote letters to Halligan," Dunn says. “Not just thank you letters, but they wrote reflective letters."

Halligan is helping improve Lakeview Middle School's bullying system, he says. Since his appearance, Dunn is in the process of changing the school’s bullying rules. The next step for the school is to implement the Olweus anti-bullying system, a set of guidelines for reform.

Halligan is now working with the American Council of Education to expand the anti-bullying law to include cyberbullying.