Posted 04/18/07
Trailing the movie scene
Rating the newest movie trailers
Jon Taylor l managing editor
jtaylor@smcvt.edu
Kickin’ It Old Skool (4/27) — It seems like no matter what I do to stop him, the bane of my existence, Jamie Kennedy, continues to make movies that resemble large amounts of fecal matter being thrown by monkeys at walls.
So, let’s count down what’s wrong with Kickin’ It Old Skool, shall we?
It stars Jamie Kennedy. Strike 1!
It’s about break-dancing. Strike 2!
The trailer is painfully unfunny so much so that I think I may have gotten dumber by watching it. Strike 3!
Please, I beg of you — stay as far away from Kickin’ It Old Skool as possible and God willing, Jamie Kennedy will never make a movie ever again.
GPA: 0.3
28 Weeks Later (5/11) — There really isn’t a need to make a sequel to 28 Days Later, the fantastic new-school take on the zombie flick from Trainspotting auteur Danny Boyle. With that being said, 28 Weeks Later doesn’t look half as bad as it should.
28 Weeks Later follows several different people coping with the destruction of the British Isles after a virus obliterated any sign of regular human life. The U.S. Army declares victory over the infected, yet – as with all zombie movies – something sinister still lurks beneath the surface. Of course, this all takes place seven months after the initial infection hit the ground.
Relative newcomer Juan Carlos Fresnadillo helms this sequel, which doesn’t seem to feature any actors present in 28 Days Later. Usually, that would indicate box office poison, but Fresnadillo has a firm grasp on the visual style that made Boyle’s film so great in the first place. The shaky point for this sequel is its script, co-written by Fresnadillo and four — count ‘em! — FOUR other writers. That would account for the generic horror movie stand-by of the Young Kid, who is prominently featured in the trailer.
As with all films, beware the curse of too many writers — just because there’s more, doesn’t mean they can avoid flimsy plot holes and awful characters. Nonetheless, 28 Weeks Later may be worth seeing in the theater, even if it’s just for a few cheap scares.
GPA: 3.0
Evan Almighty (6/22) — Ok, so Bruce Almighty was decent, but a follow-up without Jim Carrey? This would be the definition of lost money if it weren’t for Steve Carell, star of audience and critical favorites The 40-Year-Old Virgin and Little Miss Sunshine. The wacky Daily Show alum has a penchant for strange farce and Evan Almighty looks to be Carell’s bee-line into the mainstream comedy world.
Carell reprises his role as Evan Baxter, the loose-lipped jerk newscaster from Bruce Almighty. Evan has a newfound political career and everything is going great until God (Morgan Freeman) shows up and commands Evan to build an ark. Of course, Evan puts this off until the last seconds before the flood and everything goes to pot. The trailer hints at some kind of sentimentally goopy ending, the very curse of the original Almighty film.
C’mon Hollywood ! Give me just one movie without moral subtext!
Recent reports put the film’s budget at a record-setting $225 million and from the looks of this trailer, it seems like the producers have spent every last penny. However, something about the price tag indicates that Evan Almighty has the makings of a 2007 Wild Wild West, that $170 million Will Smith bomb from the mid-90s. Carell’s newfound popularity may be able to save animals from God’s flood, but he’s going to be hard-pressed to keep Evan Almighty afloat.
GPA: 2.5
Martian Child (6/29) — Martian Child is going to be one of the strangest movies to hit multiplexes in a long time. Based on a novelette by David Gerrold, the film follows a single man who adopts a young boy. The catch? The boy believes that he is a Martian from outer space. Where the movie goes from here is anyone’s guess.
The most intriguing part of Martian Child is its choice of actors, featuring rom-com king John Cusack as the adopting parent. Cusack’s presence in this family film is certainly welcome, but he seems out of place, even in the trailer. As per usual with Cusack films, the supporting cast is reliably sturdy with Oliver Platt, Amanda Peet and (as always) sister Joan Cusack .
Unfortunately, this movie looks like it might just stretch audiences’ imaginations too far for its own good. Although John Cusack can be quite good in other genres (psychological thriller Identity and black comedy Grosse Pointe Blank) he may want to stay away from family films, particularly feel-good sci-fi fare that barely has enough fumes to keep itself going.
GPA: 2.7
